Do not feel sorry for us, we owned a 19th century 6200 square ft. three-story Victorian mansion, which sat on 5 acres of land.

I actually felt like Alexis Carrington of the television series "Dynasty"

I dated a bit but no one I liked enough to make permanent.

One day, I said to my mother, "the next man that rings that doorbell is going to be my husband."

“DING-DONG.”

I opened the door and there he stood - a man that looked like he had been on the road for days without washing - wondering if we had anything for him to eat.

He walked past the church that was directly in front of our house and ended up at our front door. He asked for something to eat and looked like he wanted us to put him up for the night. We gave him something to eat and sent him on his way.

When he left - my mother said,

"You better go get your man."

You would think right then I would learn to stop tempting fate - but no.

Think about the last decision you made for yourself. A decision when you did not say to yourself, "If I get a sign... [From the heavens] I will do XYZ". 

For the life me, I cannot remember making one decision in my adult life that did not hinge on something else happening first. 

Not sure when I started living life by the 8-ball predictions, maybe it was after my divorce, maybe after my short-lived career as a rap artist/model/actor.

Not sure when exactly but somehow I started playing it safe and wound up living life by default. 

My life finally sent me a message of my default status living on December 20, 2010. 

Oddly enough, the occasion ended with these words "Good Luck." Really, I thought to myself, "what two ominous words to send me off with".  It was relying on chance that got me there in the first place.

I thought of myself as NOT a gambler - yet now I realize I was a gambling all along.

I was a gambler whose winnings were meager -to- nil.

There are two types of gamblers - conscious and unconscious.

The unconscious gambler lives his/her life by default.

S/he plays it safe.

S/he has big dreams but instead of pursuing the lofty goals directly, s/he takes small jobs here and there, hoping that someone will notice him/her for the position s/he really wants.

S/he hopes s/he will be in the right place at the right time and BAMM! Someone will discover he or she and s/he will be the next Oprah, Bill Gates, Beyoncé, Mark Zuckerberg or any great in his/her field.

S/he never pursues the goals because s/he doubts if the 'blessing' really has his or her name on it.

Therefore, s/he puts it in G-D /Universe's hands and states, "if it is really for me to achieve G-D/Universe will make it happen."

What never occurs to the unconscious gambler is s/he is "tempting fate". Scriptures expressly forbid us to test G-D/Universe and appears when we do it is a no win situation.

Instead, sacred text or scripture encourages us to " walk by faith" or vibrate at a higher level of consciousness of faith (doubt/fear being the farthest away from G-D/Universe).

Strangely, this concept is lost on the unconscious gambler who doesn't realize those living legends mentioned do not live their lives by default 'hoping' they are on purpose.

It seems as if every move they have made to advance their career is deliberate. Instead of 'hoping' G-D/Universe will send a sign, the purpose driven person focuses on G-D/Universe.

Instead of waiting for a sign, those leaders got on the road and followed the signs that led them to their destiny.

You cannot get to where you want to go unless you start moving.

For example, instead of waiting for an answer on how to stop living a default life, I started writing and the signpost that was up ahead was Earth Wind Fire's "Getaway".

I always thought the song was about escaping -and maybe it is but for me, it tells the story of how to get your life out of neutral (default) and into gear. 

So that is it, I have made my last decision by default. It is time to " Getaway" with my purpose and me at the wheel!